The Fan-fic without a name or meaning
by T. A. Kitange
Summary: Windfarie (whom most of you may not know) and i just went a little crazy when we wrote this. Normally i wouldn't write stuff like this. If you like it, tell me and i might make the continuation.


The Fan-fic without a name or meaning  
  
Windfarie @--- Chrissy  
  
  
Characters  
  
­ Jake  
­ Tobias  
­ Rachel  
­ Tobias  
­ Cassie  
­ Tobias  
­ Marco  
­ Tobias   
­ Ax  
­ Tobias   
­ Ellimist  
­ Tobias  
­ Erik the Chee  
­ Tobias   
­ 2 mysterious and hyper F.F. Writers  
­ Tobias  
­ Visser 3 (the old one)  
­ Tobias   
­ A bunch of controllers (AKA- V3s goons)  
­ Tobias  
­ Stolen movie stars :-D  
­ Tobias  
­ *Nsync  
­ Tobias  
­ BSB  
  
(Did FFW 1 mention Tobias?)  
  
  
  
A long, long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away  
The Animorphs and a whole bunch of other people,  
Were being harassed by two mysterious and very hyper FF Writers  
  
  
FFW 1&2: (in unison) sing a happy, happy, happy, happy, happy, happy song  
Marco: Nooooooooo! Anything but that!!!!! Heeeeeeeelp meeeeeeeee!!!!  
Rachel: Marco, shut up! (speaking to FFWs) And who are you?!  
FFW1: (in a too happy voice) I'm fan-fic writer one!  
FFW2: (in a really cheerful voice) And I'm fan-fic writer two!  
FFW 1&2: And together, we are the fan-fic writers of this story!!!!   
MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!  
  
(silent for a moment)  
  
Tobias: C-H-A-R-T-E-R, people.   
Marco: (serious tone) You can't get help here, get help somewhere else.  
Rachel: Isn't it supposed to be "If you can't get help here, get help somewhere"?  
Jake: What I think he meant was that we can't help them.  
Cassie: (in awed voice at what Tobias said) Wow, Tobias can spell  
Rachel: (responding to Jake) I knew that.  
Ax: Can we go to the Cinnabon now?  
FFW 1&2: QUIET!!!  
Marco: (interupts) THIS IS A LIBRARY!!!  
FFW 1: (mutters to FFW 2) He's the one who needs Charter, not us.  
FFW 2: I think he already tried.  
FFW 1: We should pitty him... you know, he's less fortunate and stuff.  
FFW 2: No we shouldn't.  
Rachel: (laughs)  
Marco: Hey, I heard that!  
FFW 1: (in a retarded tone) Haw, really?  
FFW 2: (to FFW1) HMMMM... HOW ABOUT... WE TALK LIKE THIS?  
FFW 1: KEWL, LET'S DO IT!  
Marco: (being nasty) Really!!! Ewwwwwwwww!!!  
Rachel: (ignores Marco and talks to FFW 1) That's my line!  
FFW 1: (also ignores Marco as Roswell's theme song starts to play) I'LL DO WHAT I WANT-  
(music stops playing in a screech as she spots Tobias and switches to a more sugar-coated  
tone) HELLOOOO.  
Tobias: (looks at Rachel) Uh... (shivers in his little bird body)  
Rachel: (in a comforting tone) Don't worry my little birdie, I'll protect you.  
FFW 1: (in a menacing tone) NOT IF I GET TO HIM FIRST...  
Ax: Um... Cinnabon?   
FFW 2: NO! LEAVE ME ALONE!  
Jake: Hey! Don't yell at him!  
Cassie: Why are you protecting him? You're supposed to be protecting me! (looks jealous)  
Rachel: (laughs and aims question at Ax and Jake) Is there something you're not telling us?  
Ax: (looks confused)  
Jake: (is speechless)  
Cassie: Oh really?! (Stomps off)  
Tobias: (Rolls his "cute little birdie" eyes)  
Rachel: (responds to the description of Tobias) Watch it.  
FFW 1: (innocently) WATCH WHAT?  
Rachel: You'd just better watch your ass.  
FFW 1: (pretends to be blond, looks confused, looks down at her backend, looks back at Rachel,   
looks back at her backend and proceeds to turn in circles while trying to stare at her   
own behind. ^As seen in "Good Burger" ^)  
FFW 2: OKAY... UM... HI!!!  
Marco: Hi?  
FFW 2: HI!!!  
Jake: Hi?  
FFW2: HI!!!  
Rachel: Quit it!  
FFW 2: UM... WHY?  
Rachel: (sarcastically) I dunno, maybeee bekaus... heay, wat ar yu doin 2 me?  
FFW 2: JUST HAVING SOME FUN  
Marco: Really...  
FFW 2: MARCO, I THINK IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO-  
Tobias: (interrupts) "Find yourself another dumb blond!"  
FFW 1: (stops spinning at the sound of Tobias' thought speak) IT'S COME TO MY ATTENTION THAT IT  
IS IMPOSSIBLE FOR ONE TO KEEP AN EYE ON THEIR OWN BUTT.  
Rachel: (ignores FFW 1 and remarks to Tobias) dum bond?!  
Tobias: (looks confused) No, I said "dumb blond"  
Rachel: Cose enoff.  
FFW 1: SEE, YOUR GIRLFRIEND CAN'T EVEN TALK RIGHT!  
Ax: Cinnabon?   
Jake: No Ax, not now.  
Rachel: Aw, the cupl iz fiting.  
Jake: Fitting???  
Rachel: Fiting  
  
(boot gets thrown from a not so far away distance)  
  
Jake: Okay?  
Rachel: Hu?  
Tobias: Looks like Cassie's boot...  
Jake: (thought comes to mind) WHAT?!?!?! Alright, who is she with?!  
Marco: Let's find out...  
Rachel: (imitating commercial) A-hone, A-toooo, A-fieee...  
Ax: Fi?   
FFW 2: (laughs and puts on So Weird theme song)  
Jake: (rolls eyes) let's.... FIND CASSIE!  
  
(second boot comes flying and hits Jake upside the head)  
  
Jake: ooooooooow!  
(Cassie's voice): Watch where you throw things!  
Jake: Lets... go. (collapses on ground)  
FFW 2: (laughs) HOW FUN  
  
(Ellimist joins)  
  
FFW 2: AH. THE ELLIMIST DECIDED TO JOIN THE PARTY.  
Ellimist: HEY, YOU CAN'T TAKE THE WAY I TALK!  
FFW 2: OH YES I CAN.  
Ellimist: NO YOU CAN'T  
FFW 2: YES I CAN  
FFW 1: (starts singing the song for the Gatorade commercial)  
Ellimist: NO YOU CAN'T  
FFW 2: YE-  
Rachel: (interrupts) OK, stopuh it al fiee ov yu!  
Ellimist: IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH RACHEL?  
Ax: Cinnabon!  
Ellimist: CINNABON?  
Ax: Cinnabon.  
FFW 2: UM... (wonders if she should say that she was doing that to Rachel) YES, ACTUALLY,   
SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH HER. HAVEN'T FIGURED OUT WHAT IT IS YET.  
Rachel: Wat du yu mene?! Yu ---- ------! Hey!!!!!  
FFW 2: (laughs really hard)  
Ellimist: HEY... YOU SOUND FAMILIAR.  
FFW 2: (Stops laughing) SHHHH. DON'T TELL THEM! THEY MUSTN'T FIND OUT!  
Ellimist: (chuckles)  
Tobias: Uh... is there something you two need to tell us?   
FFW 2: HMMMM... NO.  
Marco: (wines) Why not?  
FFW 2: BECAUSE. DON'T QUESTION MY AUTHORITY. IF I DON'T WANT TO TELL YOU, I DON'T HAVE TO.   
NOW YOU'RE GETTING PUNISHED.  
Marco: lleh eht tahw? Yeh! *What the hell? Hey!* ^says sentences and words backwards ^  
FFW 2: (laughs)  
Marco: siht etaicerppa ton od I! *I do not appreciate this!*  
FFW 1: AND YOUR POINT WOULD BE?  
FFW 2: (laughs harder)  
Elimist: OH. THERE'RE TWO OF THEM.  
Tobias: What did you do to him?   
FFW 2: (can't answer through her laughter)  
Jake: (comes back to consciousness) What's so funny?  
  
(shirt belonging to a girl ^hint, hint ^ gets thrown)  
  
Jake: Let's go!  
Rachel: Guo were?  
Jake: Just follow me.  
  
(everyone follows Jake 'till they come to a room. They all enter.)  
  
Rachel: (in shock) Casy!  
Cassie: (only in her bra and jeans, lying on bed on back) Rachel?!  
Jake: (noticing Erik lying nest to her) Erik! What are you doing with my girlfriend?!  
Erik: Uh... um...  
Marco: (just noticing what is happening, closes eyes and covers ears) Rorroh eht! *The horror!*  
Jake: What's wrong with Marco?  
Rachel: Evrytin  
FFW 1: TRUE, TRUE, VERY TRUE.  
Jake: (ignores Rachel, Marco and FFW 1. Soap opera music starts to play) But why, Cassie?  
Cassie: You... and... Ax...  
Jake: We have nothing going on, Cassie. You're the only one for me. I just wish it were the  
same for you.  
Cassie: Please, Jake, I didn't know what to do. I panicked. I'm sorry. You are the only one   
for me. You are. Will you ever forgive me?  
Jake: (serious but being forced to say it) No.  
Cassie: I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Please.  
Jake: (in control again) Hey! Damn you, FFWs! I would never say that I would not forgive   
Cassie! (Talking to Cassie, soft tone) Of course I forgive you.  
Cassie: (hugs Jake)  
Jake: (hugs Cassie)  
FFW 2: (soap opera music stops) DAMN! THAT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN!  
  
(Tobias suddenly disappears along with FFW 1)  
  
Jake: (starts french-kissing Cassie)  
FFW 2: NO. NO! NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO!!!  
Rachel: (backs out of the room)  
Marco: (opens eyes, sees what's going on and gets out of room)  
Ellimist: (pushes Erik and FFW 2 out of room and closes door behind himself)  
FFW 2: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! THAT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN!!!!!  
Erik: What did you do to me?!  
FFW 2: NONE OF YOUR BUSSINESS!  
Erik: Yes it is!  
FFW 2: WELL I DON'T WANT TO TELL YOU. I'M GETTING BOARD. I THINK I'LL-  
  
(Unexpectedly [even to FFW 2], *NSync and Backstreet Boys join)  
  
*Nsync and BSB: huh?  
FFW 2: (begins to talk normally and squeals) Hi!  
Nick: (stares at the brunette girl in confusion) Uh... hi? Do you know where we all are?  
FFW 2: (smiles) Yes. You are in my fan-fic. And although I am a fan of yours, this is not on  
torturing you, so you don't have to worry.  
  
(More-Powerful-Fan-Fiction-Author-Than-1st-and-2nd has joined)  
  
More-Powerful-Fan-Fiction-Author-Than-1st-and-2nd: I was using them in my fic and I need them  
back!  
  
(MPFFAT1STA2ND takes *NSync and BSB and leaves)  
  
FFW 2: (confidently) They'll be back.  
Rachel: (looks around) Hay! Were's Tabyas?!  
FFW 2: (seriously) I don't know. I can't find FFW 1 either.  
Rachel: (eyes widen) Se wudnt dair.  
Marco: (trying to be serious) Snoisulcnoc ot pmuj ton s'tel. Tsrif meht rof dnuora kool dluohs   
ew. *Let's not jump to conclusions. We should look around for them first.*  
Rachel: I ges wee sud luk ter (starts to the door that leads to where Cassie and Jake are)  
Marco: Lehcar, tiaw! Wonk uoy... eb dluoc Eissac dna Ekaj. *Wait, Rachel! Jake and Cassie  
could be... you know.*  
Rachel: (insistently) I wana fine Tabyas!  
Marco: Enif, enif. Tsisni uoy fi. *Fine, fine. If you insist.*  
Rachel: (opens door)  
Cassie & Jake: (too busy to notice)  
FFW 2: (raises eyebrow)  
Cassie: (moans)  
Ellimist: (pushes everyone out)  
Marco: Ereht ni eb ton dluow Saibot. *Tobias would not be in there.*  
Ax: Cinnabon?   
FFW 2: (ignores Ax; gets angry because Cassie and Jake were not supposed to be having fun;   
decides to talk like the Ellimist again; agrees with Marco) OF COURSE HE WOULDN'T.  
Rachel: (sadly) Ten e as too bee wit F-F-W-1.  
FFW 2: NO DUH! DON'T YOU KNOW SHE LIKES HIM?  
Rachel: Ovyuslee  
FFW 2: I'M GETTING BOARD. WHEN WILL SHE BE DONE WITH HIM?  
  
(FFW 2 leaves because she knows that it will be a long time for FFW 1 to get finished with   
Tobias.)  
  
Rachel: Gud. Se's gon. Two baaduh se cudnt lett mee talc rite.  
Marco: Oot em. *Me too.*  
Ax: Cinnabon. *Me too*  
Ellimist: UM...  
Marco: Edud eulb, yeh! Thgir, tuo su pleh nac ouy? *Hey, blue dude! You can help us, right?*  
Ellimist: NO.  
Rachel: Know, yu don wana? Ore know, yu kant?  
Ellimist: BOTH. UM... I THINK I... UM... HEAR MY MOM CALLING.  
  
(Ellimist leaves in a hurry. FFW 2 comes back.)  
  
FFW 2: OOOOH. FUN, FUN, FUN. I JUST GOT A PERSONALITY CHANGE.  
Rachel: Does that mean you'd be nicer? Yay! I can talk right!  
FFW 2: NO. AND I DON'T LIKE TALKING LIKE THIS. Okay, that's better.  
Rachel: You're not going to be nicer?  
FFW 2: Not to you. And I have to say. I have a lot of different personalities and they can  
change at anytime, so you are warned.  
Rachel: What are you going to do?  
FFW 2: Make you have the nightmare of your life so far.  
Rachel: (gulps) So far? No... please don't...  
FFW 1: (Way off in the background laughing) Oh Tobias, stop that!  
Rachel: Alright. That's it. (stomps towards brick wall and bangs head into it and is now  
unconscious)  
Marco: (looks at Rachel) Oooookay...  
FFW 2: (laughs)  
  
(Suddenly another mysterious FFWriter joins)  
  
FFW 3: (Talking to Animorphs) Hi guys. I'm back... with power.  
Marco: Girl Power!  
FFW 2: I don't know you! What are you doing here and why did you make Marco say that???  
FFW 3: Um... Because.  
  
(Suddenly V3 [The old one] and his goons appear)  
  
Marco: I don't like that V8 juice. It's too tomatoi.  
FFW1: (Listening in on there conversation, decides to give her imput on the matter) Kinda  
like ravioli... Almost spelled the same, too.  
FFW 2: I think it was the Splash kind.  
V3: I am here, you know.  
FFW 1&2&3: Your point?  
  
(Suddenly...)  
  
Ax: (Cinnabon cinnamonbun in hand, rushes at Marco) CINNAAAABOOOOOON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
(Hits Marco over head with cinnamonbun, knocking him unconsious)  
FFW 1: D@mn. Musta been old and hard.  
One of V3's male goons: Much like Marco's--- OOF!  
V3: (elbows her in the ribs)  
FFW 2: Awww... poor Marco.  
FFW 1: Marco is poor, but why would you say Awww?  
FFW 2: (glares at FFW 1) Why do you think.   
Rachel: (gets back to consiousness)   
FFW 1: oh... um... bye.   
  
(FFW 1 leaves to go back to Tobias)  
  
(Jake comes out of room, hair and clothes rumpled.)  
  
FFW 3: All better?  
Jake: (looks at FFW 3 and smiles) Yeah.  
FFW 3: (smiles back and walks towards Jake) Let me smooth your rumpled hair. (starts   
smoothing Jake's hair)  
FFW 2: (laughs insainly)  
Marco: Oooookaaay?  
FFW 2: (laughs again) I just got a little high off of a really cool sent. Anyone wanna join?  
FFW 3: (stops smoothing Jake's hair and shirt) Cool, lets go. (Starts to get high off of   
the really cool sent)  
Jake: (joins her)  
Rachel: (joins)  
Marco: (also joins)  
FFW 2: (laughs again)  
  
(suddenly FFW 2 dissappears and everyone is unhigh)  
  
FFW 3: huh?  
Miliani: Hellooooooo  
Cassie: What? Hey! How dare you make me not fan-fic writer 3 anymore!  
Rachel: You were Fan-Fic Writer 3?  
Miliani: Oh, so all of the sudden you people don't care that I'm here?  
Marco: Who are you  
Miliani: (glares at Marco) You're not included in the "normal" group. You can like... I  
don't know,.. play with yourself in a corner somewhere. Go away and I better not   
see your ugly, what you would call, face. Now leave.  
Rachel: Nice choice of words.  
Miliani: Thanks.  
Cassie: So how can you have the power of a fan-fic writer and not be called it?  
Miliani: I can show you. But you have to promise not to get freaked or anything.  
Cassie: We promise.  
Rachel: Or supposedly  
Cassie: (ignores Rachel)  
Miliani: (smiled, showing her fangs)  
  
  
{{What will happen? Who knows. Tune in next time for exciting conclusions to "The Fan-fic   
Without a Name or Meaning"}} 


End file.
